


What Idiots We Are

by atomic_brunette



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Jealous Steve, M/M, Pre-Captain America: The First Avenger, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, The boys are idiots, mentioned Bucky/OC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-01 11:33:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13997418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atomic_brunette/pseuds/atomic_brunette
Summary: "They're real sweet girls, Stevie. I wish you'd come dance with us." Bucky said, sitting sideways in his chair to lean against the wall with a forearm resting on the table. Steve tried not to eye the way his sleeves were cuffed to reveal strong forearms or how his collar was unbuttoned to expose perfect tanned flesh. He definitely wasn't wishing he was the reason those lips were so swollen and pink or his hair disheveled, strands falling into his eyes.





	What Idiots We Are

The night had been going about as well as all the other overly-exaggerated dates had, and Steve hadn’t expected it to go any other way. Shortly after they picked the girls up, Bucky ended up with both his date  _ and  _ the one that was supposed to be Steve’s on either arm, each immensely absorbed in his gorgeous boyish grin and charm while they ignored the frail asthmatic twig who pathetically tagged along behind them.   
  
They started with dinner where Steve wondered how he and Bucky were to pay for four decent meals in one night (he didn't even want to know where Bucky came up with all that money, but it probably involved a few skipped dinners of his own) before moving on to the local dancehall where they intended to “show the girls a good time on the dance floor,” as Bucky put it. Well, at least he and the girls had a good time. Steve, rather than attempt at pretending he knew what he was doing and embarrassing himself further, just sat in the corner and watched, jealous of how close their bodies were. He would give anything to be one of those dames, pulled tight against that sturdy chest as their limbs moved fluidly to the music- to be the one whose chin was tilted up by those calloused yet gentle fingers so their eyes could meet before their lips did. He wanted-   
  
Steve broke himself of his reverie and downed the rest of the whiskey he’d ordered, savoring the trail of warmth it left in his chest. It didn't matter what he wanted. It didn't matter that he was in love, because his love was impossible-  _ illegal _ . Two men couldn't love each other, not in the way Steve loved Bucky. Besides, the feeling wasn’t mutual. Bucky was always chasing after dames, coming home with disheveled clothes and the remnants of lipstick stains on his face. Steve’s stomach sank at the thought. How could anyone want a weak, scrawny boy who was damn near constantly sick and sometimes nearly cost the rent for medicine? One who wasn't supposed to live past the age of ten, let alone into his early twenties? 

  
Steve sighed as he watched the bright fabric of what was supposed to be his date's skirt flow as Bucky twirled her, wide grin on his lips. All Steve was waiting for was for them to take a break, then he could make his escape and at least go sulk and maybe break into their larger (and already paid for) liquor stash in peace. He was hopelessly in love with his best friend, as far as he was concerned a night spent numbing the ache in his chest with alcohol was justified.    
  
After the song finished the trio left the dance floor, panting and laughing with sweat beading on their foreheads. Bucky plopped into the chair across from Steve while the girls excused themselves to use the restroom, probably to apply more powder to their flawless pale skin.    
  
"They're real sweet girls, Stevie. I wish you'd come dance with us." Bucky said, sitting sideways in his chair to lean against the wall with a forearm resting on the table. Steve tried not to eye the way his sleeves were cuffed to reveal strong forearms or how his collar was unbuttoned to expose perfect tanned flesh. He definitely wasn't wishing he was the reason those lips were so swollen and pink or his hair disheveled, strands falling into his eyes.    
  
"Actually, Buck, I think I'm gonna head home." Steve said, diverting his gaze to stare at his own knobby knuckles resting on the table.    
  
"Oh c'mon, Stevie, ya haven't even talked to Lily." Bucky argued. Lily was the girl who was originally Steve's date, her friend Isabel being Bucky's. Both were twigs, arguably even smaller than Steve, though Lily was still a good inch taller than him. At least with her heels.    
  
"Kinda hard to talk to someone who's not even listening." Steve said, almost sounding bored. Really, jealousy aside, he was. This was nothing that hadn’t happened before and he knew how it would end if he stayed.   
  
"Steve, I-"   
  
"Just...I'm gonna go home, okay? Go have fun with the girls." He cut off, though it wasn't hateful. There was more sadness in it than anything, and he knew Bucky could both hear the strain in his voice as well as see it in his eyes. There was no lying to Bucky; he knew all of Steve’s tells, no matter how hard he tried to hide them- a result of practically being attached at the hip since the third grade.

  
Knowing he couldn't change his mind, Bucky told him, "Give me a few minutes, I'll talk to the girls and tell them-"   
  
"Bucky, seriously, don't worry about it." Steve said, interrupting once again. "Go have fun, it's nice to see you happy. You deserve a night off. Enjoy it, okay?"   
  
Before Bucky could protest further, Steve was already standing to leave and the girls had just emerged from the bathroom.    
  
"I'll see you at home, Buck." Steve mumbled as he threw his jacket on and pushed his way out of the club.    
  
The crisp early December night shocked his lungs as he left the warm interior, chest already aching with the early threat of an asthma attack. He palmed his jacket pocket, searching for his pack of asthma cigarettes before realizing he forgot to grab them from the dresser of the apartment. The tightness in his chest grew and he could only hope he made it to the apartment before anything significant happened.    
  
Thankfully the streets were quiet. Most people were either asleep or in a bar or dancehall of their own- it was too cold to stay outside and chat. Unfortunately that also meant no one was around to help him should he need it. He focused on his footsteps, trying to divert his attention to keep his breathing even.

  
Steve was almost halfway home when the tightness in his chest became a harsh wheezing. He tried to take a few steadying breaths, none of them working to ease the constriction.    
  
_ Shit. Shit, shit, shit! _ He mentally cursed. He was stupid, so  _ stupid _ for leaving his cigarettes. Even more stupid for sulking over his best friend dancing with someone who deserved him more than Steve. If Bucky ever found out, he'd be appalled;  _ disgusted _ , even.    
  
Tears streaked Steve's face as he grasped a light post for support. He was so stupid and so selfish, and now he was going to die in the cold just because-   
  
He heard a voice behind him, hardly able to hear it over the wheezing and rush of blood through his ears. Before he knew it there was a warm hand on his back.    
  
"Stupid punk," Bucky murmured. Before he could acknowledge his presence a cigarette was being pressed into his hand, Bucky pulling a pack of matches from the same pocket he'd fetched the cigarette from. A sharp crack was heard as the match was struck, and Steve gratefully allowed him to light it with a hand protectively cusped around the flame to shield it from the breeze. He took as much of a drag as he could handle before falling into a coughing fit.   
  
"What the fuck were you thinking?!" Bucky scolded, though he still watched with a concerned eye.    
  
"I wanted to give you a chance to be alone with them, not have your lame friend dragging you down." Steve replied raggedly, wiping at the tears in his eyes before attempting a second drag. Thankfully it went fractionally smoother and he was able to allow the smoke to sit in his lungs for a moment.    
  
"You were already upset and then you decided to go into the cold without your goddamn cigarettes- Steve you had me worried sick! If you would've given me a minute-"   
  
"You don't have to treat me like a child, Buck. I'm not some fragile piece of glass you have to tiptoe around!" Steve snapped, raspy voice betraying him.   
  
"Apparently I do, otherwise your skinny ass would be frozen stiff on the damn pavement!" Bucky returned, the concern in his eyes burning more than ever. "If you would've waited just a second I would've at least given you these, you left them on your dresser. Now take another hit, you're still wheezing."    
  
Steve looked away as he inhaled another puff. When he decided he was okay and moved to put the rest out against the pole, Bucky scolded him further.    
  
"You're still not breathing normally and the air's too cold. We're walking home and you're finishing that." He said, slinging his arm around Steve's waist, almost like he had with-   
  
Steve refused to let his mind wander that way, not when Bucky was right there. It seemed too much of an invasion of privacy to imagine the lewd things his mind wandered to, let alone when the man it involved was right there. 

 

“What about the girls?” He asked instead.

 

“I told them I had to go. One of ‘em got prissy about it an’ I told her to stuff it.”

 

“You didn’t have to do that.”

 

“We just went over why I did, pal. Now keep smokin’.” Bucky replied gruffly, leading him home.   
  
The rest of the walk was spent in silence. Steve had finished most of the cigarette by the time they made it back to their apartment, finally putting it out on the concrete of their steps while Bucky worked to open the door.    
  
"I'm sorry I snapped at you." Steve mumbled as they shrugged off their coats. It wasn't much warmer inside- not yet, anyway, but it felt significantly so due to the lack of the chilling breeze.    
  
"You know I hate it when you scare me like that." Bucky replied softly. "Now are ya gonna tell me what you were so worked up about back there?" He asked, crouching in front of the fireplace to rekindle the embers left of what had been burning earlier.    
  
"I was tired and just wanted to let you be alone with the girls." Steve answered, trying to get around the topic.    
  
"No, you weren't. I know the difference between when you're tired and upset. What's got you bothered, Stevie?" Bucky pushed, straightening up once the new logs caught flame. God, he looked gorgeous with the glowing flames crackling behind him, accenting his lax figure, toned arms jutted out while his hands rested on his hips. Steve would have to paint that later.    
  
"Nothing." He lied, hoping Bucky would let it go.    
  
"Steve-"   
  
"I said nothing, okay! Lay off me." He defended, turning away to grab the cast iron kettle from the kitchen. His stubbornness wasn’t well supported by the way his ragged voice cracked.   
  
" _ Stevie. _ "   
  
This time it was gentle, and Steve felt warmth radiating from where strong hands gently grasped his arm.   
  
"Stevie, look at me." Bucky murmured.    
  
Steve reluctantly relaxed and turned around, shoulder still in Bucky's grasp.    
  
"What's wrong?"    
  
Steve looked up into Bucky's gorgeous gray-blue eyes, lost in the gentleness radiated from their core.    
  
"You'd hate me for it." Steve warned, already feeling tears prickling at his eyes. He couldn’t lie, not any more.   
  
"Try me." Bucky replied, voice low and quiet.    
  
Steve looked away.    
  
"I can't, I-"   
  
"Steve, doll, look at me."    
  
He didn't- he couldn't have- Steve must've misheard that. Bucky would never call him "doll," that was only for the gorgeous dames he twirled around on the dance floor, whose lips were allowed to touch his, who were the reason Bucky came home with clothes rumpled and half-unbuttoned.    
  
"I saw you eyein' me back there."   
  
"Bucky, I don't-"   
  
"Stevie," Bucky interrupted, wiping a stray tear from his cheek, hand moving to cup the back of his head. “I know it wasn’t the first time, either.”   
  
And then-   
  
Then Bucky leaned forward, eyes fluttering closed, gently tugging Steve's face closer as his lips- oh god, softer and warmer than he'd imagined -were pressing against his own. His chest felt as though it was about to burst, his body freezing. When Bucky noticed him stiffen, he backed away.    
  
"Steve- shit I'm sorry, I shouldn’t-"   
  
Bucky Barnes, famous for his silver tongue, now stuttering like an idiot in front of him. Not even the most gorgeous of dames could do that. To make things even better, in the flickering light of the fire Steve swore there was a dark blush painted on those cheeks.    
  
Bucky noticed the small grin that played at Steve's lips, stopping his rambling.    
  
Steve grabbed him by the back of the neck and pulled their bodies together so that he felt Bucky's warmth, chest flush against his own. He'd never kissed anyone aside from a quick peck on the cheek or lips, but it wasn't hard to figure out. It didn't take long before Bucky's tongue parted Steve's lips and they deepened the kiss. Bucky moved his arm to cup the small of Steve's back, other hand still tangled in his hair. He moaned softly into Bucky's mouth, slightly grinning as he felt a fist form in the hair at the nape of his neck, body pulled even closer- as if that was even possible. He felt Bucky’s heart pounding in his chest, overlapping his own. All of this felt right,  _ natural _ , as though he’d finally found home.   
  
Their kisses were hungry and sloppy, as if this moment could be taken away at any moment. It wasn't long before Steve felt Bucky’s hardening length pressing against his thigh. Knowing that he was doing this, he was responsible for Bucky's arousal, made his own stiffening cock twitch. Bucky grinned against his lips.    
  
"That for me, babydoll?" He asked in that gorgeous, low voice. When he shifted just right, the friction between their bodies was enough to make Steve whimper.    
  
"C-couch." He replied shakily, hardly able to stand for much longer. Under normal circumstances it would be embarrassing, but it was Bucky: Bucky, who’d been there for him from the beginning, Bucky, who never once put himself above Steve, Bucky, who was so obviously in love and Steve had been too blinded by his own embarrassment as to notice. He picked him up and held Steve by the thighs while his legs wrapped around the sturdy man’s waist, carrying him the few steps to the sofa and laying him down gently before lowering his body to straddle his narrow hips.    
  
God, this was something out of a dream. No, it was something out of heaven- or maybe not. Steve wasn't so sure if he was even allowed there after the thoughts he'd had, let alone what they were engaging in currently. He couldn't care less whether it was right or wrong; the weight of Bucky on his hips, the obvious tent in his pants grinding across his own...he'd gotten himself off for less.    
  
When Bucky moved to pull Steve's shirt off, he protested at first. Seeing his frail, thin body was sure to be a turn-off, and there was no way in hell Steve was about to risk losing this.    
  
"I think you're beautiful, Stevie. Always have, why do you think all those girls are tiny as you?" He placed his arms on either side of Steve and leaned forward in one fluid motion until his lips were just beside Steve's ear. "It's easier to pretend." Bucky whispered before gently nibbling on Steve’s ear, and holy shit did that send a shiver down his spine. He stared at Bucky with a mixture of disbelief and wonder; how could someone so handsome think something so scrawny was beautiful? His mind wandered for just a moment, wondering if maybe this sudden confession was alcohol’s doing: maybe he had gotten worked up while dancing with the girls and just needed someone to give him attention elsewhere, but there was hardly a trace of it in his breath. Normally, he came home in a drunken stupor, swaying on his feet and half the time after Steve had already fallen asleep. Now, though, Bucky wasn’t even tipsy. 

 

Steve let him slide his undershirt up over his head, tossing it to the floor before removing his own shirt. He had seen that body shirtless before; it wasn't uncommon for them to change in the same room in the mornings or see the other walk out of the shower shirtless. This time, however, he allowed his eyes to linger where they were never allowed to before. Bucky's arms were lean and muscled, a result of working on the docks day after day. Steve let his line of sight trail down from his collarbones to his visible but not overly prominent abs, resting at the faint "V" that led down to the buttons he so desperately wanted to undo.    
  
"You can touch," Bucky murmured, taking Steve's hand and placing it on his stomach before leaning forward to run his own hand gently over Steve's cheekbone. He couldn't help but close his eyes and lean into the touch- it was careful and safe and inviting. His own hand drifted from the soft, warm skin of Bucky’s abdomen to thumb over his ribs, other hand reaching up to join it on the opposite side. Steve hadn’t realized how starved for touch, both on giving and receiving ends, he was until now.   
  
Bucky hooked his fingers under Steve's chin, holding it steady as they shared yet another kiss, this one slow and passionate with Steve's fingers digging into Bucky's side. They kissed and kissed until Steve arched his back and his hips ground against Bucky's, eliciting a groan from the latter. It was as if something primal had been awakened- there was a new glint to his eyes when his gaze met Steve's, something almost resembling when they used to wrestle on the floor as teens or hell, even last month; he’d tackled Steve as soon as he had one foot through the door, scolding him for withholding the letter that had confirmed his admission into art school. Had he wanted Steve then, too?    
  
"M'gonna take good care of you, Stevie." He murmured, breathless. That made Steve's hips arch yet again, warmth pooling in his belly and aching for release.    
  
Bucky let out a small, husky laugh that seemed more like a primal growl, placing one more gentle kiss to Steve's forehead before shifting his weight to settle further back on his thighs.   
Steve's breath hitched when he felt Bucky's fingers trail lightly over the sensitive skin just above his pants as he worked to unbuckle the belt to free them. Bucky gave one more questioning look that was answered by a nod of reassurance, before he slid his boxers over his bony hips and down far enough to meet his pants at his thighs. 

 

“God, you’re so beautiful.” Bucky marveled, one hand grasping Steve’s hip and thumb stretching to brush at where dark, curly hair started. That in itself- the feeling of being touched so gently where no one had ever touched him -was nearly enough to set him over the edge. Let alone the thought that it was  _ Bucky _ .  _ Bucky _ had slid down his pants because out of all the gorgeous dames that would swoon when he walked into the room, he wanted  _ Steve _ . 

 

“Don’t look, babydoll. Want you to  _ feel _ .” He murmured darkly, fingers moving from his hip to thread through coarse hair. Steve had no problem obeying. His head had already arched back, eyes closed with the silent moan that had threatened to escape his lips. 

 

He nearly whined at the lack of warmth when Bucky’s hand moved, but not even a second later later sparks began to fly across his vision. He felt Bucky’s mouth on him, hot and slick, tongue swirling across his slit. He knew he couldn't make much noise- by this hour, most residents of the complex were already in bed, and any noise they made was susceptible to echoing. Before he knew it, Bucky took him all in, enough that he felt the head of his cock brush the back of his throat. Steve fought the urge to jerk his hips, biting back yet another moan of pleasure before grabbing Bucky’s wadded up shirt and using it as a gag. Bucky worked diligently, mouth bobbing up and down while Steve’s moans were muffled into his shirt. He couldn’t help but peek. 

 

The sight of Bucky with his gorgeous red lips wrapped around his cock and cheeks hollowed as he sucked him was enough to make Steve pull the gag from his mouth and whimper, “Buck, ‘m gonna- gonna-”

 

Bucky pulled back with an obscene pop, grinning deviously at Steve’s disheveled appearance. The eyes that were normally a stormy blue-gray were now mostly black, pupils blown wide. His hands drifted to his own pants, trembling fingers working to undo the belt buckle and fumbling with the buttons. His movements were quick, needy, as though he was desperate for his own release. In one fluent movement, both his pants and underwear were pulled down far enough to reveal his cock, full and flushed and glistening with pre-come. Once again, he gave one more questioning look, still panting slightly. 

 

“Whatever you want, Buck.” Steve murmured, just on the edge of out of breath. Bucky bit his lip as he dove forward, one hand bracing himself up against the couch as his mouth crushed against Steve’s. When he ground his hips down and his hardened cock slid perfectly against the blond’s with nothing between them to stop the friction, it was nearly enough to make him come. 

  
Bucky reached down with his right hand, grasping each of them with glorious pressure that set him right back on the edge. When Bucky noticed, he lessened his grip so it was just borderline teasing. His mouth was simultaneously making itself busy yet again as his lips crushed onto Steve’s, swallowing the gasp of his name as his hand tightened just barely. 

 

“You look so pretty for me, babydoll.” Bucky murmured between kisses. After a moment, he leaned down further and let his lips just barely brush Steve’s ear before whispering, “I want you to come for me.” 

 

Between the added friction of both their hips jerking and Bucky’s hand, it took nothing for those words to set him off. Goosebumps rippled across his flesh as nothing but white flashed across his vision and he was caught in a silent moan, fingernails digging into Bucky’s sides as he came into Bucky’s hand. He barely even registered the latter’s hips spasming and the sound of his breath hitching as warmth spilled over his lower belly. 

 

He’d caught Bucky jerking off before when he thought Steve was asleep; an unfortunate result of sharing beds. Of course it never failed to get Steve hard as well, but now Bucky was coming for _ him _ . All of it,  _ all _ of it, was just for Steve.

 

Bucky sighed and collapsed on the small bit of couch that wasn’t occupied, draping one of his legs over Steve’s while he shifted his smaller frame over enough for Bucky to wrap an arm around him, facing each other on the couch. 

 

“None of ‘em compared to you, Stevie.” Bucky murmured, reaching up to pet at Steve’s hair. “Not one of ‘em.”

 

Steve sighed happily and nuzzled into Bucky’s collarbone, breathing in his scent and enjoying the warmth that chased out any of the remaining ache in his chest- for several reasons. 

 

“How long?” He asked quietly, thumb running over Bucky’s side, savoring every bit of contact he had.

 

“Years.” Bucky returned, just as quiet. Steve felt his voice vibrate in his chest. 

 

“Me too.” He confessed. 

 

Then Bucky was laughing, a slow, breathy chuckle. 

 

“What’s so funny, Buck?” Steve asked. 

 

“We’re a couple a idiots, ‘s all.” He said, gazing fondly at the blond snuggled close. “Coulda been doin’ this the whole time.”

 

Steve looked up and was met by a gentle kiss on his swollen lips. He sighed and kissed back, equally as gentle. 

 

“You know how much I wanted to be one a those dames?” Steve murmured. 

 

“I know, babydoll.” Bucky murmured sympathetically with his forehead pressed against the blond’s. They both fell silent for a moment, fingers trailing over skin as Steve’s eyes began to slowly droop shut. 

 

“C’mon, let’s get cleaned up and then we can get into bed.” Bucky said, Steve’s eyes fluttering open at his voice. 

 

Bucky grabbed a couple of washcloths and dampened them, both boys stripping and cleaning what they needed to before throwing on long underwear and the thickest sweaters they could find. Bucky let Steve wear one of his, sleeves covering his hands and the sweater hanging to his mid thigh. He clasped the hem of the sleeves with his fingers and crossed his arms, enjoying the soft warmth of the sweater. After brushing his teeth, he noticed Bucky still wasn’t in bed, which had been stripped of the comforter and sheets, leaving only the bare, ratty mattress.

 

“Buck?” He called, padding out to the living room. Bucky had the sheets, spreading it out on the couch cushions that had been moved to make a palette in front of the fireplace. The comforter, along with the worn quilt Steve’s mom had made Bucky years ago, were peeled aside.

 

“I could move the mattress too, if you want.” Bucky offered, standing after straightening the comforter. Steve couldn’t help but grin at the offer, giving a small huff of a laugh as he curled up close to the fire, Bucky sliding in right beside him. Once they were settled he turned to face Bucky, who pulled him close so that the blond’s head rested on his chest with his arm draped over Bucky’s stomach while a warm weight around his shoulders cradled him close. Steve sighed at the feeling; it was the warmest he’d felt in years. 

 

“Stevie?” Bucky asked quietly. 

 

“Hmm?” Steve hummed. 

 

“I love you. Always have.” He confessed. Steve sighed, Bucky’s heartbeat slow and steady beneath his ear.

 

“Me too, Buck.” He replied, tightening his arm around Bucky’s stomach as if he could pull himself closer. “I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This fic is unbeta'd, so I'm open to corrections! Feel free to tell me what you think, I love getting feedback :)  
> I've just created a Tumblr, you can find it [here](https://atomic--brunette.tumblr.com/)


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